Oh what a night

I have insomnia most of the the time and I just cannot fall asleep, but somehow I managed to fall asleep before 9pm to only get awoken and then I was unable to go back to sleep I even watch 4 episodes of 90210 (the new one) and did not fall asleep.. Last Night was chalk full of the family DRAMA. 


Anywho because of all the family drama last night my behind is dragging today, thank goodness its only Sunday and not Monday.. Its 11:15 and I am now just moving my lazy behind out of bed and getting ready for the day.. Babysitting today at 3 so I need to get some energy some how
 

terrible four and a halfs?

Really tell me is there such a thing?

Because let me tell you Alexis is certainly demonstrating terrible 4 1/2's and I am about out of my mind. 

I think the problem lies in the daycare/preschool she started when I no longer had a car to drive her to school anymore, so we had to say goodbye to our beloved preschool all of our friends and teachers. We brought cupcakes and had a farewell party and Alexis got tons of hugs and I will miss you from all of her friends.

The new preschool is obviously not a good fit with Alexis she has regressed in the few months she has been there and this horrific behavior hitting and punching me, this is all new. Now grunting and wining instead of using her words. She has PVL and Mild CP and global delays though she has caught up greatly while at the former school, she is losing these things and my little girl is disappearing and in her place a mean one.

well I had found out last Tuesday that I would have a car in a couple weeks so I spoke to former schools director and she had a spot for her, so I gave my 2 weeks notice to the new school and I am happy to report she returns to beloved school on August 8. I get my car August 5th so it worked out with timing fantastically

I am hoping that soon after being back in her old habitat my sweet girl will emerge once again. After all the preschool room at beloved school has classrooms with age appropriate children together, at new school she was the oldest and the rest are 2 yr olds, Beloveds preschool class is 3.9 to 5 or 6   better than the age 2-5 ratio.

so I cannot wait for her to be back at beloved school, only one week left at this school...

Linking up for 5Q Friday

1. Vow renewal ceremonies-yay or nay?

I don't really have a Yay or Nay for this one, I can see why some people do it like because of illness or they are reconnecting after breaking up or some such

 

I am not married and have yet to be, because I believe Marriage is forever, yes I thought  I would be Married to my children's Bio Father, but so glad that ship sailed on. 

 

So seeing that I believe marriage is forever  I don't really need to do it for fake when I already had the real deal.

 

Though it I find the Love of my Life maybe my view will change? 

2. What sound/s annoy you the most?

winey kids or wining in general... OMG it drives me up a wall when Alexis gets all winey, Dylan never did.  

 

My mom says well ones a boy and ones a girl but I have seen winey boys and men as well

3. If you had to pick, would you have only all boys, or only all girls for kids?

Nope I cannot pick I really Like my one boy one girl combo its great, though because my youngest is a girl I think I want another girl if I have another, sisters are great.  But I think I am done with a capital D. Dylan will be 18 in March, Alexis will be 5 in November.  I am getting older and don't think I wanna chase little ones, I had Dylan at 16 so the better would have been a child in between but that didn't happen

 

4. Do you believe in alternative medicine?

I believe in positive thoughts and prayers I have thought of acupuncture, but have yet to try is so I guess so. 

 

5. Would you take a family member's children and raise them if they needed it?

I guess it depends on the circumstances, I would like to say absolutely but when Alexis was a sick baby, the state took my nieces 3 kids away, I just could no handle 3, and including Alexis there would have been 3 under 2 1/2.  Alexis didn't walk and there was the baby and the toddler was delayed and there was a 6yr old, just couldn't do it, felt bad.  My sister their grandma is raising them. I help when I can

catch up on my life lately

My car shit the bead  died on me three months ago I have not owned a vehicle since and I have had to depend on people for rides, which is a complete and utter pain in the behind

for one month I did have my dads van because he had an infection in his leg that prevented him from driving.

I had to take Alexis out of her preschool and move her to one that provided transportation, totally not a good fit for her I have just given my 2 weeks notice and thank goodness she is able to go back to her old school where she thrived.

I joined a program called more than wheels and I am getting a bridge car through their bridge program which is a loaner/rental car. In the long run I will end up with a brand new car in 6 to 9 months. Yay for dependability and no more shit boxes cars that have seen better days. I get my bridge car Friday August 5th so one more week carless is all thank goodness. I have been going stir crazy. The car is right on time Alexis starts back at her school the 8th.  In this program you also take a financial fitness class which has also taught me some good

I am a terrible blogger, random thoughts

I get gun ho about blogging then I don't

Life happens and I don't

sometimes fun things happen and I neglect to blog

and the this is I do like writing what I am feeling out, because it makes me a better person

I do not care that I am uninteresting and no one reads me its and outlet and I think I should try to write more. I write on the Facebook everyday. Sometimes I post quotes.

I heart quotes

I however did write a heartfelt blog yesterday about Jim, I am really good a Narratives so maybe I will write some Narratives?

we will see

A day I will never forget

I was at the court house I told the clerk that I needed to speak to someone about him, That he needed treatment this Time and not to just be tossed in a Jailcell, he has been sick and has been cutting down on his alcohol intake but he needs treatment... Sitting in the courtroom I awaited his name to be called as I had not seen him the day before in the morning before I headed to work, I kissed him on the cheek and whispered that I loved him, remembering the night before how he told me I was so sweet and he loved me... A Police man came over to me and said the person you're waiting for is en route to the hospital that there was some sort of incident.... I get in my car I drive to the hospital that is just a little bit up the road, I go to reception and say I know he is here but that your not supposed to tell me but the police said he was brought here, someone comes and takes me to a little waiting room, a lady comes in and makes some idle chatter and says the doctor will come in and tell you whats going on... Enters Doctor, well we worked on him and were able to revive him but then he just didn't make it... My world totally crashed around me.. you see he had and old stupid warrant from years back and 2 of his friends decided to turn him in to get him some help but he was never brought to the hospital just to jail, where I eventually found out is where he actually died. He was my boyfriend, his name was Jim Cheney and he was an addict, he quit a heroin addiction before he was my boyfriend, I had known him for a long time and fell in Love with him, he would have given you the shirt off his back but he couldn't slay his demons and he died on January 19, 2006... He would have been 32 a few weeks later his birthday was February 4, Tragic ending to a young life.


this is what I thought of when I heard the news of Amy Winehouse its just sad how drugs and alcohol can destroy lives. for Mama's losing it writing prompts